The phase of life, when you actively, consciously withdraw yourself from love and hate.
The moments when nothing seems to reach your heart. Nothing seems to stir it. Or even touch it.
Neither love, and care nor hate, and abuse.
Nothing..
When the soul is being pinched and pinned, when your inner light dimmed, when the innocence is lost, when you can't be yourself, under the pretention of being someone else.
Is it a life worth living?
Or are you dead already and waiting for it to be announced?
As a family or self, we should work towards making the culture of seeking approvals obsolete.
Taking / seeking approvals for anything we do, or feel, might seem a very logical process of keeping a check on things happening, but the other way round is proves to be more damaging.
Read on as I explain what I meant....
My sister always says this to me - you always just give information about your whereabouts, but never ask for permission to do things from parents. Esp for travel, or the purchases, etc.
That's in fact true. When I asked my mom, what keeps her happy, she said, if you are happy, I will be happy. Nothing else matters to me, what you do, where you live, how you live. So I made it a point in my life to keep that as a bottom line, in anything I do, Am I happy, Will I regret doing / not doing this later, What's the worst implication..
So, I never waited for their approval and only sought my happiness.
Now, let's understand the other side of things, where you are seeking someone's permission, approval to be what you want to be.
We often hear this:
1. Amma, I want to come on a train with friends.
Amma: No, flight is better. You will reach home in 5 hours, and it is safe.
2. Amma, I want to buy this t-shirt.
Amma: No, shirt looks good on you. I know what looks best for you.
3. Nanna, I want to go for an Euro trip.
Nanna: No, don't splurge money on your experiences, get more assets.
This happens all through the life.
I am not saying that we should become a rebel and do everything against our partners and parents, but having a possible conversation, understanding why we like what we like, what is the thought process behind certain decisions, is something really so stupid or unsafe to say no to - would be the way to go.
Making ones own decisions to be happy, healthy, and being away from toxicity should be a very very deep personal choice, that one makes for ones self..
My sticky note I wrote long back reads:
I don't need any body's approval and appreciation to be happy, I am the source of joy.. I spread love and joy..
And this really helped me stay happy no matter what.
Galllssss...
Small suggestion...
Don’t ever be too choosy or picky about food.. there will come a day in your life, when you don’t want to take a decision on what to cook, what to order..
Just say this to your husband and enjoy your peace...
My love, please order what you want, your favorite is my favorite.. I love what you love...
I have not seen you trip, neither crib.
I have not seen you shake, neither break.
All I saw is,
You looking for one chance,
So that you can bounce,
Not just with double the strength, but all the strength of you life.
His life was beautiful..
Snow covered white mountains...
Sanded brown deserts...
Deep black oceans...
She came into his like a sky.
Mountains turned golden, with the sun shine...
Desert turned green, with rains...
Ocean turned blue, with sky's reflection...
She coloured his life...
